The Avdenutres of Tengu McWangu
by Dr.Robotno
Summary: A story about the life of Tengu McWangu as he goes through the world of CUTSTUFF HIGHSCHOOl!
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1: It's a great day

Well, it was just another morning in the CUTSTUFF HIGHSCHOOl town. At least, it was that way for me, Tengu McWangu. I live in a pretty nice house with my parents and I even have my own room, which is neat and all. However, it isn't too super because I have to go to the CUTSTUFF HIGHSCHOOl, land of jackasses and weirdos. Man, of all the places to go, I just had to go to CUTSTUFF HIGHSCHOOl. If only I'd stayed in Wisconsin... too bad Canada annexed them. Our old house got occupied by some freaks in Bombman, Iceman, and Burstman suits, so I set fire to the house and ran off to this new place. It's been pretty shitty, but I don't care because...

"It's always a great day to be Tengu McWangu!"

I said that at the breakfast table and my dad slapped me because "i was being a loser," so I threw my avocado waffles right back in his face and drove to the CUTSTUFF HIGHSCHOOl. On the drive there, I drove right next to the busstop for all the people who went to CUTSTUFF HIGHSCHOOl, which was crammed full of losers like that Gumballtoid kid and his best buddies Thunder and Watzup. I think one of them tried to backflip, but they suckd too much dick and accidentally slamed on some other guy's face. I wasn't really paying attention to anything else but then, so when the blus slammed into my car, I was really surprised, surprised more than Bombman when I set him on fire. Everyone got in the bus, and I got on too since my car was totled. Hopefully some other loser would find my wrekced card and tow it back ot my house, all fixed.

The bus driver was an asshole so I won't talk about what happened on the bus.

My first class was with Ms. Study. She's a total bitch and nobody in the school likes her, not even the principal or even any other teachers. She teaches math and shit, but everyone always just jacked off or something, I don't really care. Thunder flashed like everyone and Ms. Study sent him to the principal;s office, and then after that we had a pop quiz. Watzup said some shit, and Smash fondled some girl, but other than that the day was pretty much normal. I finished my test, handed it to Ms. Study, and went off to lunch.

If only lunch was as simple as the rest of everything...


	2. Chapter 2

cHAPTER 2: Eating is a nice thing

So, it was lunch. Not much really happaned. I stood in line with my tray and waited.

I waited.

Waitrd. So long.

A lot of waiting was taking place.

Waiting, the act of sitting around and doing nothing.

Waiting.

Eventually I got really bored and whacekdeveroyne who was in front me out of my way so I could get my lunch. Lunch LAdy Daveris was waiting for me, with a nice heaping pile of tomato salsa abd chi[ss. I took my food and looked for a table to sit. The idiot brigate, or Gumball ,tThunder, and Watzup, weren't here yet. I guess they were busty scuking each other's dicks in the allway or some gay shit, id unno lol.  
>There was Smash, but he fondles people and he talks about fucking all the time so I didn't want to sit near him. Nobody else was sitting next to him except some girl I still didn't know. I steered clear of that shit and just sat down with my best friend Caprice. I was like "Yo wassup it's my main man Caprice" and we did some handshake thing and he said "Yooooooooooooooooooo" and I was all like "Aw yeah" and then we sat down and ate lunch.<br>The idiolto bridge burst throught he dors, saying some more gay shit I uess and then they sat down on the table next to ours. I igonred them and talked about things with Caprice.

"So caprice how's life?"

"Oh it's pretty nice. Except for all the silly pairings that're happening all the time over here and the shitty dialogue that dickhead Dr. Robotno is making me say, I'd say it's pretty nice."

"ythat's good to konw"

and then you could hear the crunching of the table as that dimbalss Waztup broke a table in half. I broke out in laughter, and I think he threw a chip at me while I wasn'looking. He then started screaming about J. Wallus or some shit and I just sat there and drank my own box of juciy juice. They were aboit to fight when a fiant gflah son throughout the room, blinding everyone that didn't vloese theie eyes or have swaggy sunglasses like me.  
>I took off my shades and saw som asshiole in a striped red shirt and basebll cap, he said some word like "OKAY" or something, his boice was reallu dumb and I wanted to laugh but he might flash me or somethung and dicks are not okay, you know? so I got up, dumped my tray in the garbage, and ran off to gym.<p>

Fuck me.


	3. Chapter 3

Chatpetr 3 – Goin to the Gum

So I got up and went to the gym until I sawtthe tri ofo assholes, and I was like "oh shit why are thy here" so I saw that Swift guy, who s a tottaly fcuking weirdo, and I asked him to go distract tem. It was funny because swift is a weird person and so he wanted to go out with thunder. They wrestled for a while and it was kinda hot but then ti was not because that dickhead Gumball kicked Swift in the head and then he stopped existing. I was going to cry for a moment, but then I remembered that I had to go to gym classq, os I did.

I barely made it to class before the bend rung. Mr. Fitness is a fat jackass, and that's all yo need know whto about him. He told us to do some awekward as hell squats and I was like "hell no" so I just didn't. I just sat on the ground, waiting for Mr. Fitness to stop doing things when some robot bird in dictator clothes entered the room. Actually, he kicke down the door, and he was probably md because he just started kicking Mr. Fitness in his fat ass. It was really funny, because R,. Fitness was screaming lal the while, screaming for security, and the bot bird was all like "You forget Mr. Fitnes, I_am _ the secuirty around here." He told us to go fuck ourselfves and go back to gym class.

Then some guy in a nurse cap broke through the doors on a rainbow scooter. Ididn't catch his name because I was too busy playing with myself, so I didn't pay attention tot the part where Mr. fitness was carried out on a whdystretcher. Class was dismissed and so everybofdy went otheir lockers. I tok my pants off and put on my jeans because I'm swagalicious like that.

* * *

><p><strong>Hello, it's your lord and savior, the Nefarious and Glorious Dr. Robotno here, and unfortunately I am cancelling the Adventures of Tengu McWangu.<br>**

**The reasons for this are threefold.**

**For one, CUTSTUFF HIGHSCHOOl is becoming such a sprawling epic that I am not able to keep "Tengu McWangu" up to date with Season 2 of CUTSTUFF HIGHSCHOOl.**

**Secondly, Tengu McWangu himself has not made any significant appearances, and so I feel that his potential would be wasted in a mere retelling of Season 1. I might come back to him soon...**

**And finally, I literally have no drive to complete this story. You may notice that I have made typos in many of my chapters. At the time, I was grappling with my most hated enemy, Depression. Or, at least, I believed it to be depression. I _am_ a doctor, you know. Anyways, I always wanted to write stories whenever I was on the medications, so that may have interfered with my ability to type properly. Hopefully it has not interfered with my ability to tell a good tale. **

**Doctor Ian Robotno, signing off. Farewell, my dear audience!**


End file.
